80s

All posts tagged 80s

80s Kids Rhymes

Posted by Jam on June 18, 2020
Posted in: Uncategorized. Tagged: , , .

Rhymes we sang in UK as kids but never when adults were about:

Hey diddle diddle,
The cat did a piddle,
All over the bathroom mat,
The little dog laughed to see such fun,
And piddled all over the cat.

What do you do when you’re dying for a poo
In an English country garden,
You pull down your pants and you suffocate the ants
In an English country garden

Tarzan in the jungle sneaking through the grass,
Along came an elephant and kicked him up the
Assssk no questions tell no lies,
I saw a policeman doing up his
Fliiiies are a nuisance bees are worse,
This is the end of my silly little verse.

My wife’s a cow
My wife’s a cow
My wife’s a cow keepers daughter.
She licks her ol’
She licks her ol’
She licks her old Johnnie Walker.
I saw her ass
I saw her ass
I saw her assking for water.
Ohhh my wife’s a cow
My wife’s a cow
My wife’s a cow keepers daughter.

Kermit the frog,
Got smacked in the gob,
For messing about with Miss Piggy.
He undone her zip,
And out popped her tit,
Then showed her his little green willy.

People think it’s funny but it’s really brown and runny,
diarrhea, diarrhea.
I was walking down the lane and I felt a sudden pain,
diarrhea, diarrhea.
I tried to climb a tree but it trickled down my knee,
diarrhea, diarrhea.
I tried to wipe my bum and it dribbled down my thumb,
diarrhea, diarrhea.
Don’t pull the chain I think it’s coming again,
diarrhea, diarrhea.
It shoot’s out your bum like a bullet from a gun,
diarrhea, diarrhea.

Mary had a little lamb,
She tied it to a pylon,
A thousand volts went up it’s arse,
And turned its wool to nylon.

Oh mummy mummy mummy,
I’ve done it in my nappy,
It’s big and brown,
I can’t sit down,
I picked it up with paper,
And ate it like a wafer,
It’s yum yum yum,
It’s out my bum.

Lockdown And Live

Posted by Jam on April 18, 2020
Posted in: adventure, competition, Fantasy, Fighting Fantasy, game, Gamebook, Gamers, Games, gaming, garden, hobbies, horror, internet. Tagged: , , , , , , , , .

Who remembers all those great classic TV programs of the 80s? The Box Of Delights? The Chronicles Of Narnia? Knightmare? The Adventure Game? These were shows that boosted the imaginations of an entire generation, and inspired many. One of those inspired was Mr Oliver McNeil, who has managed to carve himself a career out of said inspirations, creating games, and interactive theatrical performances. Now YOU can join in as he takes the show live online.

Oliver’s latest venture was a hybrid RPG boardgame named The Storymaster’s Tales – Weirding Woods and it’s already became something of a cult hit in the gaming community, with a second game Dracodeep Dungeon currently funding on Kickstarter. However, combining the elements of theatre, game, visual FX and internet you are all able to watch and take part in a LIVE interactive version on his Facebook page here https://www.facebook.com/groups/339654010167488/?ref=share

Image © Oliver McNeil

Hosted by Oliver himself alongside other actors and clever puppetry, he brings the Grimm Brothers-esque setting of Weirding Woods to life and you get to explore and take part in subplots as you strive to fulfill your primary mission be it slaying Evil Sorcerer’s or saving the world from a plague of living dead. With an ever expanding land, equipment, foes and treasure, this is a great way to spend time and liven up the pandemic lockdown. If you’d like to take part in one of the upcoming shows, click here and join the group for performance times https://www.facebook.com/groups/339654010167488/?ref=share

Saboteur 2 review

Posted by Jam on February 12, 2017
Posted in: Gamers, gaming, videogames. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , .

The last few hours have been rather exciting for me. When I was about 11 years old, my ‘then’ brother in law had managed to pick up a 48k Spectrum computer. For several weeks throughout the summer holidays I’d go round my sisters and have a game of Saboteur II. Remember it? The sequel to Clive Townsend’s masterpiece, Saboteur.

By todays standard you probably wouldn’t appreciate the impact it had on me, but it brought me and inlaw closer together although being a bellend he was still full of front and bullshit. I digress. We enjoyed this action adventure where we played some kind of stealth assassin. (The sister of the previous Saboteur). Starting off on a hang glider was origional to say the least, and you had to wait a certain amount of screens for a safe enough leap off. Jump too soon and you’ll fall several hundred feet onto a craggy cliff. 

Once you have leapt off safely, the adventure begins. You need to infiltrate a huge enemy compound (much larger than the origional) fight your way past armed guards and viscous pumas (wtf), locate a dozen or so bits of paper hidden about the complex, deactivate a huge silo, find the lower levels while you dodge vampire bats, and escape on a motorbike. What a rush!!
Canny players will draw a map or direction list as they play. I do remember managing to escape, but only my inlaw found all bits of paper and deactivate the silo. It took him three hours apparently and even then his friend lent a map to him. 

This game had everything, even the graphics improved on the origional, the pace of the hero, the flying kicks and somersaults and general flow were all nice and smooth. The pumas were especially fun to watch, and when you killed them left you feeling a wee bit guilty. (If you have any conscience at all)

It was a great privilege to chat breifly to Clive Townsend himself and if you are also a fan then check out his website clivetownsend.com for news and the saboteur goody shop. He is currently working on bringing Saboteur II to an app format having already released the first. I will certainly be waiting in the shadows for this! Goodluck Clive.
Jam out.