OK this past few days has been rather enjoyable apart from other people causing a stink. First off dad found a way to get rid of those pesky aphids in the garden. Blitz up a head of garlic with about 750ml of water and a drop of washing up liquid and pour it into your desired spray bottle. Within two months youll have something that smells so rank you’ll wonder how even the plant doesn’t uproot itself and go for a shower.

This morning at work wasn’t to be any fresher. Last Wednesday returns had received a parcel back which by Friday they decided to put outside as it had flies coming out and smelled a bit. This morning it smelled so bad that you could clock it inside the building again. I’ve taken it upon myself to wrap it in a heavy duty bin liner and leave it over by the skips. Whatever was in this parcel has rotted to the point where it had started dripping putrification liquid which has maggots swimming in it.

If anyone comes to claim this parcel they can face me before I rub their faces in it. There are some things you just shouldn’t send in the post.